According to research surveys conducted in the United States, 40% – 50% of all first marriages end in divorce; 60% of all second marriages end in divorce. The average first marriage that ends in divorce lasts eight years prior to a divorce. These statistics ae startling to many. For the most part, people don’t go into a marriage with the idea they’ll probably end of divorced.
Statistically, in the United States, there is one divorce every 36 seconds. That is 22,400 divorces every day, 16,800 divorces every week, and 876,000 divorces every year. Divorce is stressful, emotional draining, expensive and often complicated; especially if there are children involved.
Knowing the statistics may leave some people feeling nervous about the idea of getting married. It may even make some people feel like marriages simply don’t work. However, there are steps couples can take to strengthen their marriages. Couples can actively work towards strengthening their marriage before they are even married.
For example, couples that went to pre-marriage counseling reported a 30% higher marital success rate than couples that did not attend pre-marriage counseling. During counseling, couples will be asked a list of premarital questions separately. These questions will cover a wide range of topics from views on money, future children, favorite social events, where they want to live, and more.
Each individual answers the questions separately, and the couple goes over the questions together with the counselor. This allows them to see how their answers compare to each other. Fr instance, while answering questions, a couple may discover that one of that wants to live locally around their family forever, while the other wants to get out of that area and live in new places.
These questions aren’t intended to cause arguments or emphasize the differences, but rather to get a conversation started. The premarital questions may cover topics the couple never considered discussing before. The premarital questions may also force them to talk about issues they have been avoiding.
The goal is that by answer the premarital questions together, the couple can work through potential problems before getting married. However, in some questions, the family counselor may suggest they reconsider their pending marriage. Money and children are two of the most common problems that result in a divorce.
If a couple is questioning when to see a couples counselor, chances are it is a good time. Even if a couple is already married, they can still take advantage of couples counseling and the marriage advice an objective third party may be able to offer once they hear both sides of the story.