Did you know that about 28% of adoptions are private domestic adoptions? If you?ve been interested in adopting a baby, there are likely many questions you have about the adoption process — from the very beginning, to the amount of interaction a birth mom (or dad!) can have with your child as they grow. Here are a few common questions people often have, along with the answers.
Do you get to choose the baby?
In most cases, you will work with an adoption agency that aims to match expecting mothers to families looking for a baby. This way you and the birth mother can make sure you are on the same page regarding how the child will grow up, where they?ll grow up, what kind of life they?ll have, etc. It?s important to be open during this process. Many birth mothers will be interested in getting to know your family through emails, visits, and/or conference calls depending on where both of you are located.
How often can the birth mother visit their child?
Most experts today encourage adopted children to have a relationship with their birth parent(s); we?ve all heard stories, after all, about adopted children who grow up and search endlessly for information about the families that gave them up. If the birth mother you contact wants to have an ?open? adoption, then you can exchange letters and pictures with her over the years, as well as phone calls, skype, and even the occasional in person visit. Adoption centers can help to foster successful communication between families and birth mothers.
How will I tell my child they are adopted?
It doesn?t have to be as traumatic as you think. Many parents raise their child with the understanding that they are adopted so that there is never a surprise moment — it is just a fact the child accepts along with their age and the color of their hair. It?s also a good idea to scrapbook the early memories of your child — not only will this help them understand the transition they had, but it will help firmly root the idea that you were at the center of her childhood memories. Terms like ?birth mother? and ?birth father? are very common for parents to use with their adoptive child.
Are you planning on visiting adoption centers anytime soon? Hopefully these points answered some of your questions.